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Ideal Beauty – attainable by the average women?
I am a 30 yr old Female – mother. I continue to compare myself to the women around me and feel as if I am missing the mark. And the women on TV or magazines – forget about it.
I realized I am comparing myself to the wrong people. I am the only exec assisant with kids at my company. I have three children so I have a bit of a tummy but not a roll, and I hate it. I weigh190 lbs am 5′7″ – lots of muscle, large frame (but some cushion on top) (46 in bust, 36 inch chest, 34 inch waist, 48 inch hips)
But there is a part of me that wishes…that I didnt look OK considering the kids and the full time job etc. but that I am simply attractive..not with exceptions listed…just feel attractive…why cant I achieve this. I have a great marriage, beautiful children, I exercise alot (3-4 times a week), my nutriotion could be better, but I love to bake – why cant I just be happy with me…as I am. I will never be ideal – why cant I be okay with that
I think about this all the time (I’m a man). I also love to paint, and that requires drawing (like sketching out the painting) so I have given it a great deal of consideration. Nevertheless, it is a subjective topic.
My prime examples are a Leonardo painting of Ginevra di Benci (not sure I spelled it right) hardly considered a beauty by the standards of her day (or any) the early 16th century in Italy. Also, almost all paintings by Rafael (same time and place, generally speaking) featuring the Madonna (and almost all females modelled in his frescoes–he didn’t care for canvas) were of his girlfriend (they never married, but he loved her dearly) la Fornarina (the baker’s daughter, that’s all we know of her identity). She, had you asked any Italian men, was considered ugly.
But not to Rafael and I. In both cases, the handling of the paintings, the obvious affection and high regard those men had for Ginevra and la Fornarina, creates a feeling (in me, anyway, and over and over no matter how many times I see them) that these are the most beautiful woman ever. Also, Peter Paul Reubens–from which the term “reubenesque” comes? Indeed, there is nothing truer in all of nature, that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I would rather be tortured than agree with other exploitative (trying to capitalize on the insecurities of girlhood for their own lustful gain) men who would form make-up factories so that women are uncertain as to their appeal. I believe that cosmetic surgery can result in one attracting the wrong mate. I will die believing that beauty truly emanates from within, that normative is an evil concept. A cruel, vain woman (I have known many) can NOT appeal to me physically. If the love of my life were to have her legs cut off in a train accident, I would love those stumps more than the most perfect dancer’s legs.
Would you dare to contradict your son’s assertion that you are the most gorgeous woman on the planet? Call your husband’s judgement into question? Your proportions sound attractive to me (no disrespect intended) and without knowing you or seeing your picture, I know you are a fully attractive woman, and your husband could imagine no-one to be hotter than you (for he is no fool, or he would not be yours). Individuality is fundamental to beauty. Accept yourself and love yourself woman, all those of you who answered also. Standards for attractiveness are but mere hype to sell you hair coloring and crap you don’t truly need
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